Author: VC Thong

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A new book is in the making, and this will be the draft for my upcoming book’s cover.

I have never been this excited since the day I unbox my PS4. Today is the day I finally get to hold my physical book, one that I officially published!! Oh it feels when I pull it out from the side of the wrapper. (I know it sounds wrong, but I don’t care.)

It feels so good to see and hold it. I have been publishing digital copies through various platforms, but none so rewarding than holding it in my hand. I guess physical copies still has their value after all.

Still, I am trying to distribute the wrapped copies to a certain bookstore. I am thinking of Book Xcess, which as a reader myself, finds it the best bookstore that offers the best price in town. I’m still working on the distribution process.

Do tell me if you have any suggestions about the distribution, OK? I’m still a newbie in the world of writing, so I have to learn new ways and new people as more books are coming.

Stay tuned guys! More are coming! Well, actually, 3 more to be exact, if God wills it. Thank you for support!

Check out the page for my new book

Truth is, I am not a person of compassion.

There was a time I chose my career as a doctor, thinking that what I do matters, and I have the liberty to do it the way I want. Overcoming the treacherous days of being a House Officer gave me the authority to decide my patient’s fate, to choose my treating regime as I see fit.

“As long as I am on a course of justice and to save lives, what’s wrong with that? I want to stay true to my patients, to help them in any way possible!”

At least, that’s what I held on to, because I am jealous of Dr. House, who can enjoy his work by not giving a damn about what others think, as long as he got his fix of saving the person who is under his care.

I chose to pursue in the field of psychiatry because my passion has always been to crack the mysteries of the human mind and to know my next step before the one sitting opposite of me makes a move. Maybe it was my childhood, maybe it was my military influence, or maybe, it’s just my ego of always trying to assume control of whatever the situation thrown at me, to be the smartest person n the room, I am good at certain things.

But I suck, at understanding others.

I attempted twice to tackle my final MRCPsych CASC exam, and I failed miserably. I kept blaming the circumstances whereby I was too occupied with my side jobs thus not performing well. I kept wondering why is it so hard for me to pass the exam.

And today, actually, for the past 4 weeks, I was struck with a realization so shocking, it plundered me to days of sleepless nights.

Let’s review an incident today with a patient: I was tending to a middle-aged man in his 50s, struggling with his alcohol dependence, came into my clinic for help. He is sobbing, saying that he has succumbed to the temptation of his past alcohol use, and chose to drink for the past 1 week despite his effort of being abstinent for a month. He suggested the idea of keeping himself in our ward for proper monitoring so that he will be saved from his own disturbing cravings.

I came to pity the old guy, hoping I can do him a favor. Because I saw the helplessness in his eyes, begging me to help.

Just when I was contemplating my management plan, my boss, an addiction consultant, walked into my room. He was so calm and composed, unlike myself, who was so excited and troubled at the same time. He gave a definite plan within minutes after a brief understanding of the patient’s difficulty. We too sat together and discussed our management plan, and so by a blessing, he agreed with my plan to admit the patient for proper care.

“Get the Admission forms done. Explain to the patient what you have in mind,” he said.

I was excited. Too excited, that I made a so so stupid mistake, by explaining my admission plan to the patient quickly. Just about halfway through explaining, I was tapped on my shoulder strongly by my specialist, who was full of concern.

“STOP, can’t you see your patient is crying?” he said, with a frown so deep I almost couldn’t recognize his usual cheerful self.

Almost like a reflex, I muttered, “Sorry,” and I looked at my patient- his sadness has been there the whole time, but I chose to continue with my explanation despite his helplessness.

“Empathy.” My specialist commands. Then with a sigh, he took over the interview, helping me to explain my treatment plans.

I sat frozen. Terrified- not towards anyone else, but myself. How could I miss that obvious of a plea from my patient, who I was so eager to help?

Truth is, I know for a long time that I lack the one thing required to be a psychiatrist, which is “empathy”. I have struggled, again and again, hearing multiple trainers and colleagues alike telling me that I should give more compassion to others. I have tried many ways to change myself, looking for a way to overcome this obstacles of mine.

The past 4 weeks have been a disaster, where my trainers keep reminding me of the one weakness I have, telling me that it will be that one thing that will stop me from being who I wish to be. They have helped me to explore my psyche, to look for the reason behind the weakness. Without effort, they found it- my thirst for superiority and control, driven by pride.

Maybe, being a doctor is not that hard, as long as you truly care? And allow yourself to be humble?

Another sleepless night. I wish to overcome this side of me, who allows my patients to cry. Hopefully, so help me God, that I will find the way.

Thank you, my colleagues, for telling me that I need to change.

Well, after 1 week of fiddling with my newfound companion I bought from Machines Malaysia, I realized 2 things:

1. Technology does matter

2. Malaysia is not good place to publish ebooks.

10 years since the day I got my first Apple device. It was iPhone 4 then, which I bought on an online shop in Moscow during my medical school days. I liked it, but got disappointed when the motherboard fried when I got greedy and started downloading games with high graphics demand.

I switched to Samsung, and never looked back.

Until recently, I heard some rumors that Apple Pages can be of great help in my writing career. After some discussion, testings, contemplations, and sleepness nights later, I finally succumbed to the temptation and went to Machines to get it.

Truth be told, I was having a high expectation for my newfound companion, hopefully, it can bring an answer to all my frustrations since I started to write. Unfortunately, it didn’t, but it doesn’t disappoint either. It was awesome, I drew in digital for the first time in years, I explored the incredible writing software iOS Pages, and I start familiarizing myself with iOS by letting the Apple in me kill my Android-loving soul.

I look for weaknesses but there’s almost none. The whole thing is so convenient, solving my previous problems with ease. Everything is easily accessible: transferring, uploading, inserting files between one app and another requires no hassle. I fell in love again, to the one I abandoned 10 years ago. Pages in iOS is not perfect, but it answers most of my problems. Making a book is way easier now, and conveniently portable.

Also, I started another long lost passion of mine, now with the help of apps so powerful, it made my smile.

Definitely, I will not stop making something bigger. Stay tuned for the next drawing!

Alright, that’s the good news, now the bad news, and I gotta make this stick:

“APPLE BOOKS IS JUST LIKE AMAZON-INACCESSIBLE FROM MALAYSIA!!!”

There I was happily uploading my first book ‘Datuk’ to Apple Books through Apple Books, I spent the whole night setting up my account, readjusting the file to make the Ebook readable… then I was met with this:

Same as Amazon, Apple Books, for my upload, is not available in my beloved Malaysia. The lists of countries they gave when I upload the book, although quite extensive, does not include my country of residence- Malaysia. That sinks my spirit down.

But on the bright side, I still found a new platform to publish, right? Making the total of 4 online platforms:

1. GooglePlay EBooks- the only one directly purchasable in my country.

2. Payhip- Paypal supported payment, PDF format

3. Amazon Kindle

4. Apple Books- currently in review

I will still look for more. Thanks for your support, do drop a comment if there’s any suggestion for me, OK?

Rejoice my fellow Malaysians! I have uploaded my book on Google Play and it is now Live! I finally found a suitable platform to reach out to you before my local physical copies are available for sale!

I have tried purchasing it myself on google play with credit card payment and it was a breeze. Finally, the 12-days-wait for Google to complete their preliminary policy review has finally paid off!

It has been a few nasty days, to try to look for alternatives other than the mighty Amazon Kindle! While bombarded with cases during my usual hectic on-call duty, I have been researching new ways to upload my books for them to reach my Malaysian friends and families. Thank you for alerting me this issue, thank you for your interest in reading my book.

For those who did not know, Amazon Kindle doesn’t support purchases from Malaysia, possibly due to taxes and regional policy differences. I found a way to bypass the system by changing the address…

But yeah… it’s too troublesome for my fellow Malaysians to do that.

So here’s my First Book on Google Play! Stay tuned for the upcoming release of local Malaysian physical copy! More titles to follow!

Thank you for supporting!

Check out my website for more info at vcthongwriter.com

It turns out my ebook on kindle is not for sale in the US region (amazon.com), but is available else where such as UK, due to something about tax and copyright.

What a bummer. That explains why my friends has been asking me why they couldn’t purchase my book. You have been trying to support my first book but you were disappointed. I’m so sorry this has happened.

There is a workaround for this issue. We have to change our region by giving an actual address. It seems like changing the site is just not enough.

Do correct me if I’m wrong, since I’m not an expert in this.

Sorry for the inconvenience. I will try to publish my own copy in this website soon to allow my friends here to read my work. You guys back here are still my most important customers, since you all have inspired me to write in the first place. Besides, the paperback and local copies will be available, but will take a long time to reach to you.

In the mean time, let me share the way to bypass the region issue:

First off, when you open the link to purchase my book in amazon.com, it will look like this:

But if you open amazon.co.uk, it will look like this:

Now, to change the region, if you are determined to get your hands on my ebooks- which I deeply appreciate your effort, is to navigate to the highlighted ‘Content and devices‘ link.

Then you will be met with this:

Proceed to click on the Country/Region setting,

Now, this part is tricky, you will need an actual address with proper zipcode. To make things easy, search the map for anywhere in the UK, or use ones you have if your friends or yourselves do live there. Click Update and you are done!

Sorry for my dear Malaysian friends. I will try to look for better ways to bring my work to you. Stay tuned ya!

Some of you may ask, why are there photos that don’t relate much to the story?

When I drove up the hill beside the bridge, which I frequently stopped by for a good view of my beloved hometown, my usual sense of excitement was quickly replaced by a surge of unpleasant disappointment.

The narrow road was full of broken twigs and fallen leaves. The overgrown trees on the slope obstructed the beautiful city. And the once elegant guesthouse was dirty, appeared abandoned but somehow there were clothes hanging on the balconies facing the empty carpark.

My eyes sore from the sight of it. My heart ached as I remembered its beautiful past.

However, the once small town is actually growing. Few commercial and residential areas are emerging on the previously unused land. A new township with the name of “Bandar Baru Kuala Lipis (New Kuala Lipis Town)” has been blooming on the other side of the river. Connected with just a 2 lane bridge across the huge river valley that separates the old and new town, the old town quickly lost its appeal as shop owners- old and new alike, has moved their shops and investments across.

Still, the old town is the place where the Chinese community gathers to have breakfast. The horizontal street will still bustle with life in the early morning, but quickly lost its crowds when approaching afternoon.

Time has changed, the new replaces the old. That’s the way of life.

But I believe in the value of perseverance, that something good in the past should never lose its beauty, but instead enhanced by the test of time.

Historically significant, my hometown has the potential for being the best tourism spot in Pahang. Sadly, it was not envisioned or invested so.

I wish to advocate for my hometown, to raise awareness in keeping our heritage. Yes, the new will in time replace the old, but that doesn’t mean we would allow them to wither away, neglecting their plea to be a part of the community and to teach the public about our culture and history.

When I was writing the book, I see the similarity between the old man and my hometown. So I just put them in and try my luck. Who knows? One day someone in the city council read the book and decided to help me in my endeavour?

I

Early March 2020, COVID-19 was looming, baring its fangs at Mainland China, claiming lives at the rate of hundreds a day. Despite the disaster abroad, it was a peaceful time in Malaysia. 1 month has passed since we, the Malaysian Chinese, celebrated our Lunar New Year Festival.   

I received the news of my grandfather, who I loved and treasured my whole life, has died.

The funeral service was uneventful, with unspoken resentments between our families. However, I couldn’t help but contemplate the influence my late grandfather has on our family, and how his priorities that time shaped us into what we are. He deserves to be remembered by the people, because his life, although full of conflicts and tragedies, carries a very valuable lesson that I think should be learned by everyone.

Just after a few days of his funeral, COVID-19 invaded my beloved Malaysia, causing a nationwide panic. In reaction to the pandemic threat, my employers decided to lock down the whole of  Malaysia, started the Movement Restriction Order.

The whole nation was put under a halt. Shops were closed, intercity traveling was forbidden, and a curfew was enforced. No one was allowed to have gatherings. Everyone stayed at home, worried about their loved ones who were stranded far away, out of their reach.  

Amidst the chaos, one group of people were still allowed full access to their workplace. We called them the ‘frontliners’: Doctors, nurses, polices, soldiers, pharmacies, cleaners- who never rest battling the pandemic, to maintain control of the chaos, to protect their beloved country from the unseen invader.

I was doing my postgraduate psychiatry training at Seremban. After my training was completed, I was summoned back to my original post in Kuantan, Pahang. Within a week, I was called to support our emergency department for 2 weeks, when it was contaminated, causing half of its staff to be quarantined.

It was a scary time for my mother, who is a germaphobe, but not for me though. I was just glad that they did not leave me to dry.

Just days after the ordeal, I was again summoned to be transferred to the main ward building, to work under the newly founded- COVID ward team. It was an eye-opener: My 8-storey-high main hospital building has been fully transformed into a quarantine zone. The number of infected patients in ward amounted to the hundreds, causing other departments to have to move their wards elsewhere, even some have to be shut down.    

I turned from a psychiatrist trainee into a multidisciplinary doctor. I relearn the important things I have forgotten, and I enjoyed being in the center of it all, to provide comfort and laughter to my patients.

Hearing a patient I stayed up all night resuscitating, who got well days later, saying in a frail voice smiling to me:

“Thank you.”

It was a feeling long forgotten. That moment, I realised, that I must be a man of my words, to keep the promise made at my grandpa’s funeral.

I said that I will remember his smile, and use it to bring happiness and laughter to my loved ones, and my patients.

So, after my hectic days in the COVID ward, I finally got time to plan how would I make a tribute to my beloved grandpa, who inspired me to continue saving lives. I pulled out my laptop and started typing my first book.